Ok, ok, I truly suck at blogging

3 months, wow, that is inexcusable! I have the same old excuses though, work plus 2 kids equals crazy busy-ness all the friggin time. I'll spare you an insignificant details and focus on the big stuff with the little ladies:

Gabriella

• Is fully potty trained now. She wore her underwear to daycare for the 1st time today. She still has her accidents - ESP if she's overly excited about something - as in not that she'll pee herself, but rather if she's too enthralled/busy with something she'll refuse to be bothered with going to the bathroom and using the potty. Last week she crapped behind my loveseat - fun times. I think we're past that point now, thankfully!
• Has been signed up for preschool this fall! EEEK! I can hardly believe it. And let me tell ya, she is so flippin excited to go. She asks me every day "mama, I go to school?" Lol, no honey, schools closed until September
• This child talks non-stop all day long. People would call her Gabby if I let them, lol.
• Dealing with some slight jealousy issues with Emilia so has been especially mommy needy lately. Its really exhausting

Emilia

• Started cereals then baby foods, at 4 months and 4 months and 3 weeks respectively. I have to say, she was very different than G when it came to 1st starting foods. G was all over it from the get go. Emilia not so much. It took her quite a few weeks to warm up to cereal and then a while to warm up to the way fruits and veggies taste. Now? She's an animal and can't get enough. She loves everything, but especially loves ALL veggies and bananas.
• Can roll from tummy to back and back to tummy. We had a rough patch for a few weeks where she'd roll onto her tummy for sleeping but then couldn't quite roll herself back over while sleepy. Hopefully we're past that now
• She usually takes 2 sizeable naps and sleeps about 11-12 hrs over night. She usually falls asleep between 6 and 6.30pm and then wakes and starts messing around in her crib about 5.30ish.
• Is the happiest and most joyful baby ever. I swear if someone told me when I was in the midst of colic hell that she would have turn into the most amazingly happy and exuberant baby I would have called them a liar ten times over.
• She days away from her 6 month appt and I can't wait to see how big she is!

I think that's the major stuff with double trouble. Emilia adores her sister and laughs at Gabriella's slightest chuckle. I'm looking forward to the day when Gabriella will reciprocate her sister's affection for her....sigh.

In terms of what's new with me....Chris and I started p90x about a month ago. I have lost about 3-4 lbs and a few inches. I am pleased with my progress but heck I have to say, with the amount I'm putting into this I wish I was seeing more. Alas, the program is only 1/3 of the way completed so hopefully I'll be more enamored soon. I am also really super close to landing myself an amazing job - fingers crossed!

Will post more soon - I swear! No more empty promises! I think by now I've probably lost all my usual blog readers! Which, by the way, just b/c I'm not posting doesn't mean I have been reading about all of you!

We're alive, I swear!

My my, its been so super long since I posted. I had written a post nearly too months ago that I never published, and did just now (see below). I never went back to finish it, so I'll just pick up here with updates.

1. I am back at work. Have been back since Emilia turned 12 weeks old. It was way easier to come back to work this time around than with Gabriella. I think having been through it before and knowing how things will be helps so much.
2. After about 2 months of sheer hell with Emilia, she is rapidly becoming one of the happiest babies ever. This child is smiling most of the time she is awake. She has an adorable husky laugh too!
3. Gabriella is almost fully potty trained and is getting eager to start interacting with her sister more now. Emilia loves giving her big sister smiles too! (although I must say, I get the most :))

I think that's pretty much the major stuff. The holidays were really nice. My family came in from CA and were able to spend a week with us which was lovely. Unfortunately they brought the stomach flu with them. It hit Gabriella first, then me, then simultaneously Chris, and both my ILs. See, they watched the kids while I was tied to the toilet and got it from Gabriella since her diarrhea lingered on for 5 days (it was beyond vile).

I have been working with Emilia on sleep training for over a month now. By sleep training I don't mean full on CIO - but just letting her fuss in intervals. There were days from 4-7 weeks where all she wanted to do was be held to sleep. It was a total nightmare. I would spend hours a day in a darkened room rocking her and holding her while she slept. It was absolutely miserable. I decided I couldn't live like that anymore (and it was exacerbating my PPD). So I started letting her do some very light CIO and she responded very well to it. We then moved her out of our room into her room. She was still sleeping in the bouncer till right before the new year, but I made the switch to her crib and she has been there ever since. Next step was weaning her off the swaddle. About the same time we moved her into her crib she started becoming extremely irritable with the swaddle, but she still needed it to sleep her long stretches. We finally just started weaning her off the swaddle about 4 days ago. So far so good.

I also let her CIO for bedtime now if needed, but she's really been doing quite well compared to before. She is definitely learning how to self soothe and if she is able to put herself to sleep, she sleeps long, better, and wakes up cooing and happy. My favorite kind of baby :)

About my PPD - I'm feeling great these days. I am on medication and it helped me so much. I feel normal and am enjoying my children.

In terms of the pumping, I decided to stop shortly after my post below. I was dumping so much milk b/c of my imbalance that I decided it wasn't worth it anymore. Emilia did ok on regular cows milk formula but since she was still extremely fussy we decided to switch to soy and she's done great on it. Thankfully I did not get mastitis this time around either.

So yeah - things are great here. We have our challenging moments no doubt, but overall life is good. Now that I've caught up with what's been going on I'll be posting more regularly. I need and want to chronicle all of Emilia's going on's too!

Here's my cupcake this morning!

Coming out of the fog - 12/3/11

It's been quite some time since my last post and I promise it hasn't been without good reason. Things have been pretty rough here in our house with Miss Emilia who has reflux and colic. Rather than draw out all the details, I'll just list out what's been going on:

• I stopped exclusively breastfeeding and started pumping after Emilia's reflux started really kicking in and her shortened feeding times caused a second foremilk-hindmilk imbalance. I have been pumping for 2 weeks now. Initially the pumping corrected the imbalance right away, but it came back as I am still producing too much foremilk for her little tummy. Right now the only remedy is to remove the foremilk once it separates out from the hindmilk. I don't know how long my supply will be able to keep up with her demand, but we'll plug away until we can't anymore. Probably about 6 more weeks or so.
• From 5 weeks to a little past 6 weeks, Emilia has been unbelievably difficult. Not sleeping well, screaming. OMG things have been better these past 2 days, but wow, I still can't believe I'm alive after all of it. I know we'll still have some bad days and moments, but I hope we are on the upswing and her sleeping is starting to regularize a bit.
• Emilia gave mama her 1st smile on Thanksgiving she also rolled over from tummy to back during tummy time at about 5 weeks. Hasn't done it since but it was amazing to see that so early, even if it was on accident.
• Gabriella has been a typical 2.5 yr old. Very bratty and very demanding of my attention since I've had my hands really full with Emilia. I hope that as Emilia outgrows her fussiness that I'll be able to spend more time with her. Right now I feel like all we do is put movies on for her and I hate that.
• I have post partum depression.

Emilia's birth story

It was the evening of 10/20 (Tuesday). I was feeling pretty frustrated and annoyed with all the false labor I had been having for weeks. I decided to take a bath and relax, hoping that I might be able to sleep a little better than I had with all the cramping and contractions I had been having in the middle of the night. I crawled into bed about 9.45. I started to notice a little bit of cramping and remember thinking "ugh, nothing all day and now I have to try and fall asleep with these annoying cramps." I was on the verge of sleep when all of the sudden I felt a click sensation and actually heard a click noise, as weird as that sounds. I thought to myself "did my water just break?" But then nothing happened. About 30 seconds later the tidal wave came out. I literally could not believe it. Thank goodness Chris had planned ahead and had lined our mattress (my side) with garbage bags underneath the mattress pad so nothing got on the mattress. He was on the couch downstairs when I called and told him to get his butt upstairs and that my water had broken. My water broke at 9.55pm on the dot. I remember looking at the clock right when it happened.

Chris called MIL to come stay at the house so we could head out to the hospital (upon calling they told me to come right in). I'd say about 5-10 minutes after my water broke I started feeling contractions. By 10:15 they were regular and about 5 minutes apart, not too painful. In the car ride on the way to the hospital they became about 4 min apart, were slightly over a minute long and definitely the real deal. We got to the hospital at about 11pm. I headed straight into a labor and delivery suite where they checked if my water had broken and they confirmed that it had. From there I labored through contractions while they did b/w. I was checked and around the time I got there and I was at 3 cm, still 75% effaced and Emilia was at a -1 station. I let them know that I wanted an epidural. My BP was high once I got there and so of course they had to run b/w for pre-e. Clearly I was in effing pain so I don't understand why high BP would be so alarming in these cases, but alas better safe than sorry. It freaking took FOREVER to get my b/w back and by the time I got my epi it was 2am and I was already dilated 5-6 cm. OMG - the contractions I had before the epi were 2 minutes apart lasting for over a minute. I was dying. The contraction monitor screen looked like a mountain range, I'm not even joking. Ah, but sweet relief once that epi came (and what an awesome epi it was, I was very comfortable the rest of the time). The OB offered a Lunesta to help me sleep and I thought hey, why the hell not, I'll need my strength. I passed out from 2.30 till 4.30 and woke up totally refreshed. No wonder Lunesta is thought of as addicting. I need some of the stuff now!


I started feeling pressure about 5am. It was around this time that I started feeling pain again - but it was just in the area of where my cervix would be. The nurse said that baby was probably pushing on my cervical area b/c I was close to pushing. I was checked and proclaimed that I just had a lip of a cervix and that I was 9.5 cm dilated. We were going to wait a bit and labor down before I started pushing. I think it was at about 5.30 that we did a practice push - the nurse immediately stopped me and said that baby was right there and that she needed to get the OB in sooner rather than later b/c it was going to be a quick delivery. The room was prepped for delivery as we waited for the OB. I don't remember exactly what time she got there. Pushing was so easy this time around. I don't know if it was because I knew how to push from the 1st time or was just more aware of where I needed to push. It was seriously like 3 contractions later and Emilia's head was out. Then just one small push for the rest of her. The OB immediately proclaimed that she had some weight to her. Once she was suctioned she was placed on my chest and I of course started crying. That surprised me as I hadn't cried at that moment with Gabriella. I think it was more emotional for me this time b/c I knew what an amazing journey I was about to embark on and how special it was going to be. To me, Emilia looked just like Gabriella. I couldn't even believe how similar they looked.


Moments later she was taken over to be cleaned off, checked, etc. I could not believe my ears when they said she was 9lbs 1oz. I mean, WOW, we knew she'd be big, but I certainly was thinking something more in the 8lb range. Then the 22 inches long was announced and I was amazed again. What a big girl!


OB delivered my placenta and I really had minimal bleeding which was great. She said I had one very small tear with just one stitch so I was happy about that as well. I was able to BF pretty much right away and Emilia was just a natural from the start. I was just amazed.

She's here!

Our precious little Emilia arrived on Wednesday, October 19th at 6:51 am. She was 9 lbs 1 oz and 22 inches long. Her delivery was a breeze. She was out in just 3 contractions. We are SO in love!

Still here

39w3d....no baby yet. Friday's OB appt brought info that I already knew. Although apparently I did not make backwards progress. I'm still the same as my 38 wk appt (2cm/75%/-2). Asked about membrane stripping. OB indicated that it was generally something they did for borderline hypertensives and since I have had no BP issues he thought it would just put me in a world of hurt for no reason. Fine, whatever, I won't contest at this point.

Spent the better part of yesterday walking around to see if we could get this show on the road and nada. I did have some pretty sporadic painful contrax overnight, and had some this morning, but it has not materialized into anything. Mucus plug like crap has been coming out since 37 weeks. No bloody show, etc. I'm beyond sick of work. I am at the point now where all my work has been completed or transitioned so I just get to sit around and surf the net for things like "is this false labor?"

4 days till my due date. I can't even believe it. Next OB appt is on Wed.

Eff me sideways aka 39 week update

I'm still here, mentally hanging on by a thread. I still cannot believe this kid is not here. I'm at the point where I'm starting to freak out that she's going to be overdue. What I feel now will be considered pleasant compared to if that might happen.

I ended up in L&D yesterday. Not actually related to labor. I was experiencing some light headedness and headache and given my prior history of gestational hypertension my OB decided I best be checked out. Well everything is perfectly fine. Apparently I am the picture of pregnancy health and Emilia looked great on the monitors. My OB was on call and he checked me - 2 cm still, but apparently I have gone from 75% effaced back up to 50% and baby was at -4 station (from 2 weeks at -2). Not sure how we're working in reverse here. I have my usual appt with him today and want to know how you make backwards progress and what the plan is moving forward. I thought I would be a candidate to have my membranes stripped at this point given the progress I had made thus far, but now I have no idea if that's even possible or if I would even respond favorably to it. It is, as with other more natural induction methods, only going to work if you were essentially go into labor as it is.

Ugh, so yeah, eff me sideways. This kid needs to get out.