I'm sitting here today at work just thinking about my little girl and trying with all my might not to burst into tears. I'm out of tissues at my desk and if I go into the hallway it will particularly evident that I'm not holding up well. I don't know why today is such a hard day. This is already my 3rd week back at work and while I must say goodbye to my baby girl every morning, I feel physical pain when I am apart from her. Its a certain heaviness in my chest that makes it hard to breathe when I'm not with her.
I know I ranted on and on about how I was eager to go to work, to get back to some amount of "normalcy," I even *gasp* was looking forward to being away from her in the sense of taking a break from it all. I've come to realize quite quickly that its not at all like I thought it would be. I hate that I can't be with her all hours of the day...to see her smile and squeal, to learn new things...even to throw a tantrum when she's overtired or doesn't want to be put down. I would give anything to be with her right now....
::thank goodness I found some napkins from Friday's lunch on my desk::
Pool pics
8 years ago
7 comments:
Mondays are always hard. I have lots of pics of K and even a couple of videos on my computer that I need to randomly play every once in a while. I am here for ya missy. (Hey, my little bro was out and about in Chicago this weekend in lederhosen!! Swear to goodness. He is a mess!!)
I'm so sorry you're missing your little girl today. Hang in there, you'll see her soon!
My heart hurts for you when I read this post, I know its so hard to be away from your baby. But you've made it a couple weeks and you will continue to make it, I know you can do it! Im sorry today is a hard day (((hugs)))
I called it my "3 week slump" and I felt exactly like you do. My first week was spent trying to adjust to it all, my second week flew by and I thought I might actually get the hang of it, then week 3 came and knocked me off my feet! I've been back to work 7 months now and I still have some tough days, but I promise it does get easier over time. Hang in there, and give your sweet girl lots of hugs and smooches at night!
I had to tell my husband about your post because what you described is exactly why I wanted so badly to stay home. He had to know that it isn't just me.
It just about brings tears to my eyes when I read this. I'm sure it will get easier, but it doesn't take away how you felt today. Lots of HUGS to you!
I think you and I had the same day today. I almost didn't get out of bed because it meant that I'd have to leave Lyla.
You know how to reach me if you need me
the third week for me was the worst! i too, felt physical pain when i had to leave my baby, and i ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY HATED IT. i still do. but since the 3-4 week it's gotten a little better to deal with. i still would rather be at home with her, but it's not as bad. i'm not sure if i'll ever truly be ok with working full time. i didn't think it would be this hard, but i'm only about 6 weeks into being back at work, hoping it will continually get easier. some mommy's are just better with their LO's, some prefer to work. i prefer to be with my LO, and so do you. it's hard for me to give you advice, as i'm going through the same thing, but i understand how you feel, so hang in there!
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